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The Washington Post’s neologism contest winners.

December 2, 2019June 5, 2026 3098

I came across this today and broke up laughing. These are seriously clever! Thanks to the Washington Post. I wasn’t aware of their neologism contest, but I am now! Read and enjoy. Pass it along.

A blank piece of paper is God’s way of telling us how hard it to be God.

Sidney Sheldon

Substitute “damn” every time you’re inclined to write “very”; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

Mark Twain

The first chapter sells the book; the last chapter sells the next book.

Mickey Spillane

Every writer with half a brain knows to surround himself or herself with editors who are smarter, far more articulate and infinitely better looking.

Chris Claremont

My own experience is that once a story has been written, one has to cross out the beginning and the end. It is there that we authors do most of our lying.

Anton Chekhov

Work on a computer that is disconnected from the Internet.

Zadie Smith

Easy reading is damn hard writing.

Nathaniel Hawthorne

I get up in the morning, torture a typewriter until it screams, then stop.

Clarence Budington Kelland

The fact is, I don’t know where my ideas come from. Nor does any writer. The only real answer is to drink way too much coffee and buy yourself a desk that doesn’t collapse when you beat your head against it.

Douglas Adams

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.

Stephen Wright

Have something to say, and say it as clearly as you can. That is the only secret.

Matthew Arnold

Writers aren’t people exactly. Or, if they’re any good, they’re a whole lot of people trying so hard to be one person.

F. Scott Fitzgerald

Writing is the only thing that, when I do it, I don’t feel I should be doing something else.

Gloria Steinem

To me, movies and music go hand in hand. When I’m writing a script, one of the first things I do is find the music I’m going to play for the opening sequence.

Quentin Tarantino

In Hollywood, the woods are full of people that learned to write but evidently can’t read. If they could read their stuff, they’d stop writing.

Will Rogers

Writing a novel is like driving a car at night. You can only see as far as your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way.

E. L. Doctorow

If you start with a bang, you won’t end with a whimper.

T.S. Eliot

Just don’t be boring!

Robert Liebmann

The character that lasts is an ordinary guy with some extraordinary qualities.

Raymond Chandler

Read a thousand books and your words will flow like a river.